The beauty of letting go and giving up is what yoga taught me.

3 min read

I am not the type of person who gives up. I am the type of person who goes after what I want without hesitation. I’m incredibly competitive and fiercely loyal, so much so that sometimes I’ll wait too long to give up on relationships that are important to me. I just. Don’t. Give. Up.

Sometimes, you have to let it go.

I was working as a model in Manhattan at the age of 29. On paper, everything looked great, but I was sick, tired, and miserable. Eventually, I let go. It was for a good reason.

My diagnosis at 22

At the age of 22, I was diagnosed as having Crohn’s Disease. I didn’t know what Crohn’s Disease was at first, but I became familiar with it over time.

What I now know is that emotional stress and anxiety are the main triggers for my disease. Since my diagnosis, I have experienced a number of “flare-ups” that forced me to take injections with side effects, including cancer.

I was forced to stay in bed for several months because of flare-ups. This left me weak and depressed, as well as up to 15 pounds lighter.

I decided to take three months of medical leave after the most severe flare-up. My body was literally shutting off. My medication was less and less effective, and I was experiencing more pain every day.

Crohn’s disease is not life-threatening, but it can be debilitating.

During my time off, I felt like I had an endless amount of time to reflect. I kept thinking and wondering, “What is it that I am doing to my body?” My soul? “My mind?” I had to make a decision when my leave was over. I had to let go of everything. I had to let it all go.

Then, I discovered yoga.

At that time, I had been doing yoga for around ten years. Yoga has taught me to find calmness in a chaotic world. This time was different.

My practice began as a way for me to heal myself both physically and mentally. It became my path, and it has changed my life.

I let go of my fear of failure and the obsessive thoughts about the future. I enrolled in my yoga teacher’s training and have never looked back. I had no idea how I would support myself financially, but I knew I couldn’t continue to waste away.

You and my life now

Now, I am a full-time educator in New York City and Tulum, Mexico. I have the opportunity to travel all over the world and experience different cultures. I also get to meet people of all backgrounds. I’m so grateful that I found something to feed my soul and pay my bills. ).

Every day, I am privileged to learn and teach from incredibly inspirational people. People who strive to improve themselves and their lives. People who want to go a little further face their fears, desires, and truths.

Today, I try to let go every day a little to help myself be free and to help others do the same. I’ve let go of the need to control people, situations, and outcomes. I have let go of negative relationships and thoughts that take up space in my head and heart.

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